Sunday, January 6, 2019

The Bumblebee Movie

There have been a long string of movies the kids have wanted to go see but couldn't because they were rated PG-13.  It started back in India when the first installment of the new Star Wars trilogy was released "Force Awakens" (not-so-affectionately dubbed "Professor Rankins" by Elise).  The kids were dying to see it, and all our friends were taking their under-13 year-old children to see it, but for Elise and I, it was a hard "no".

I distinctly remember being under 13 and wanting to go see "Dune", also rated PG-13.  But from my mom, it was also a hard "no." We can't protect our kids from a lot in life, but we can shield them from the intensity and gratuitous violence inherent in these movies. There are plenty of good PG movies to see. There was no reason to rush them in to see something industry experts acknowledged should only be seen by children with the emotional maturity level of a 13 year-old. 

When I heard they were going to make a PG Transformers movie, we were all excited.  The kids love Transformers as much as my brothers and I loved Transformers when we were kids.  (Probably more so, because Transformers came a little late for me.)  The PG Transformers movie was "Bumblebee", and Peter, especially, couldn't wait to go see it.

Peter is our "pew-pew" kid.  He can often be found pacing or, more likely, running back and forth in the living room or play room, from one side of the room to the other, acting out an action sequence only he can see in his head.  Spittle flies as he acts out explosions and detonations, laser fire and dragons roaring.  Elise swears she ends some days with PTSD due to the number of imaginary rounds and ordinance going off inside the house or in Peter's head on any given day.  I know exactly where he gets it. I was the same way. 

For months, he was asking me when the Bumblebee movie was coming out (Bumblebee is the name of one of the Autobot Transformers that turns into a yellow VW beetle).  He would ask me to show him the trailer on YouTube. I read reports the movie was going to be less intense than the other Transformers movies, geared toward a younger audience, and more in the spirit of the 80's cartoon than the loud, over-the-top Michael Bay CGI-fest of the previous five Transformers movies, all rated PG-13.

When the movie finally came out in Jordan this Christmas, we saw it was rated PG and rejoiced. Peter was ecstatic and couldn't wait to see it.  I told him I would take him before winter break was out. Just to be on the safe side, I read the parental guidance on Common Sense Media, a website which helps parents decide which movies are age-appropriate for children and explains why they may not be, i.e. violence, language, sexual content, etc. When I went on Common Sense Media to read the reviews, they were what I expected and described a much more light-hearted movie with themes of friendship and an actual plot. Something, evidently, the other Transformer movies lacked. 

But it was rated PG-13.

Evidently, the Jordanian film ratings were a little less stringent than the American ratings.  Perhaps, Jordan has a higher tolerance for violence. I don’t mean to be coy or disparaging, but given the region’s propensity for war, it may not be surprising a movie with some violence would get a lower rating here than it would somewhere else in the world. Who knows. In any case, we thought it was rated PG only to find this movie, too, was rated PG-13. 

I was encouraged by the parental rating on Common Sense Media. Elise told me she didn’t really care if I took him to see it, almost encouraging me to do so. The worst of the sci-fi violence, according to the website, was a Transformer blasted a human to an amorphous splatter of liquified goo. At least we knew what to be on the look-out for. 

I took Pete to the 3:45 showing. We bought our tickets and popcorn and settled into our seats...in the back row. As the opening credits rolled, Pete splurted out, “This is so exciting!”

The movie opened with a pretty loud fight scene set on Cybertron. It wasted no time getting right into it. At least I would no early on whether or not Peter was up for this. 

He made it through and most of the rest of the movie was funny, lighthearted, and super cute. A little “E.T.” A little 80’s coming of age. The two scenes when the Decepticons reduced a human to a pile of snot were well telegraphed and Pete covered his eyes in plenty of time. 

With about 30 minutes left though and the plot picking up, the cuteness factor was going way down and the intensity level was cranking up. Pete would never admit as much, but I could tell he wasn’t really into it any more. The Decepticons were really scary and just plain nasty. I leaned over and told him we didn’t have to stay; we could always watch it again sometime soon when he was ready. He quickly agreed and we left the theater, hand in hand. 

He had fun, nonetheless. When he got home he unleashed a major (and much needed) information dump for Sam and Clementine. It was the therapy he needed to get it all out. 

Later in the evening, he and Sam accompanied each other for showers in the back of the house, Peter sitting on the toilet while Sam took a shower, telling him more about the movie, Sam returning the favor when it was Pete’s turn, playing his new ukulele for him while he showered. I stood in the hallway for awhile, unbeknownst to them, listening to them go back and forth, thinking maybe I had done something right when all previous indications were I had made a bad decision. 

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